MF Doom - Deep Fried Frenz lyrics

Before we go any further
Friends

As you call 'em, they call you when they need something
Trees for the blunt, the g's for the front
I found a way to get peace of mind for years
And left the hell alone, turn a deaf ear to the cellular phone

Send me a letter, or better, we could see each other in real life
Just so you could feel me like a steel knife
At least so you could see the white of they eyes
Bright with surprise, once they finish spitting lies

Associates, is your boys, your girls, bitches, niggas, homies
Close, but really don't know me
Mom, dad, comrade, peeps, brothers, sisters, duns, dunnies
Some come around when they need some money

Others make us laugh like the Sunday funnies
Fam' be around whether you paid or bummy
You could either ignore this advice, or take it from me
Be too nice and people take you for a dummy

So nowadays he ain't so friendly
Actually they wouldn't even made a worthy enemy
Read the sign, no feeding the baboon
Seeing as how they got ya back bleeding from the stab wounds
Y'all know the dance, they smile in ya face, y'all know the glance
Try to put 'em on, they blow the chance
Never let your so-called mans know ya plans

How many of us have them?
A show of hands
Friends!

Is a term some people use loosely
I'm real choosy on what I choose to let crews see
You telling me, I try to act broke
Jealousy, the number one killer among black folk

Fellas be under some type of spell, like crack smoke
Ghetto Cinderellas, lead 'em right to your stack, loc
Just another way a chick will lead to your end
I check the dictionary for the meaning of friends

It said
Person, one who likes to socialize with
Sympathizer, helper, and that's about the size of it

Most of the time these attributes is one-sided
To bolster the crime, they apt to shoot you through your eyelid
And they can't hide it, going wild like a white bitch
Sometimes ya need to cut niggas off like a light switch
Click!
And when things get quiet

Catch them like a thief in the night, what a riot
I first met Mister Fantastik at a arms deal
Don't let it get drastic, think of how your moms will feel
When it get for real, the steel get to sparking
Everything darken, and ain't no talking

For something so cheap it sure buys a lot of trouble
You're better off focusing than trying to plot to bubble
Or else it'd be a sad note to end on, the guns we got is
One's we can depend on
Friends!

Some come in the form of co-dependence
A lot of times only end up being co-defendants
Ten bucks say they tell for a lower sentence
And leave you up under the jail, beggign for a penance
It don't make no sense, what happened to the loyalty?
Honor amongst crooks, trust amongst royalty
I'd rather go out in a blaze, than give 'em the glory

How many of us have
A similar story
Friends!

Before lovers we used to have some type of over standing
Just so when I let her get the man thing, she know its no strings
We could do the damn thing, but ho its no rings
Just how the tramp swings, will she see 'em again?
That depends on how good was the skins
And could she memorize the lessons, it ain't no need to pretend
Even though she let them stab it, she know they just friends

Friends!
How many of us have them?
Friends!
Ones we can depend on?
Friends!
How many of us have them?
Before we go any further

Fellas!
Don't be silly!
I know who my friends are
And the next nice neighborhood I move into
You guys'll get crack
Hahaha

Negro humor always escaped me

The most powerful, the most mysterious monarch in all the world
Guided by a fighting force than never sleeps
That never relaxes its vigilance
For none is as feared
None has as many foes
As Doom, the awesome ironclad lord of-

I know who Doom is
-Then tell us
He happens to be the most dangerous man in the world
I'd hope we'd never hear from him
I'd hope we'd never battle him
But now the worst has happened and I must tell you what we're up against

I first met Doom years ago
When he wanted to be alone
Alone to pursue his forbidden experiments
One day while conducting a secret experiment

Later, when he recovered from his injuries
Instead of having learned his lesson
Doom was bitter, angry, vengeful

What have I done to myself?
My face, it is hideous

He traveled the world, seeking a cure for his disfigured face
-I'm sorry sir, there is nothing we can do for you

He traveled to remote villages, where strangers are seldom seen
He continued his search, never showing his face
Unless threatened by bandits who prey on travelers
Who foolishly wander alone through their domain